Jeff / breathing 'low'
Breathwork session with Jeff
In this story, you’ll read about how tension - when not released - can be stored in the body for years, and that Breathwork can be helpful to release stored tension. The breathing exercise this time is to help to breathe ‘low’: diaphragmatic (belly) breathing. I already wrote about the benefits of abdominal/diaphragmatic (belly) breathing. For those who would like to practice this: you’ll find the exercise below the picture.
I met Jeff and his wife Sal nine years ago, when I travelled in Thailand. At that time, they managed the resort where I stayed for a few days and we became friends. We don’t see each other often because we live on different continents. They in North America and I in Europe. But now we have quality time for more than a week, so there is definitely time for a breathwork session😊.
Jeff spent half a year living with Buddhist monks in a temple in Thailand. Since breathing is an important part of a monk’s daily life, Jeff is an experienced breather. I don’t need to explain anything to him about the power of his own breath. A connected breathing session, however, combined with bodywork is new to him. He can’t wait😃.
For your information: ‘connected’ means that there is no pause between the inhale and the exhale. The inhale follows immediately after the exhale. A connected breathing session can be extremely helpful to get out of your head & into your body and to release stored tension.
Jeff tells me about his intention for the session. He feels tension in his abdominal area for quite a while now, and he would like to release some of it. We start the session with a short body scan, giving attention to various parts of the body. Jeff closes his eyes and follows my voice. After the body scan we start the active breathing part of the session (about 30 – 40 minutes) and we keep the breathing ‘low’. We slowly build up the breathing rhythm, both in speed and in intensity. I notice that he is an experienced breather. For some people, the mind can get in the way at the beginning of a breathwork session, but not for Jeff. After a few breaths I can already see the shift from mind to body, from thinking to feeling.
Jeff and I are working together to create space in his abdominal area. Jeff does this by following my breathing guidance and instructions, and I support him through touch, massage, body movement, and the use of my drum. All of this helps to release the tension that has been stored. When there is a release, I can feel his abdominal area becoming softer. After the active part of the session, the relaxation/integration phase follows, during which Jeff returns to his normal breathing rhythm, his eyes still closed. After a few minutes, I see a smile appear on his face, and it remains there throughout the entire relaxation/integration phase (about 20 minutes). At the end (his eyes still closed) his thumbs go up and he says: “Nice!” Then he opens his eyes - his thumbs still in the air - and asks: “Can we do this every day next time you’re here?” There is only one answer I can give: Sure😃! After that, during the evaluation, he mentions that he feels very relaxed and that his abdominal area feels softer.
Author Bessel van der Kolk describes beautifully in his book ‘The body keeps the score’ how the body remembers everything, even what we seem to have forgotten. Tension you feel - mentally, emotionally and/ or physically - in any situation that cannot be released, can get stuck in your body. And it may cause symptoms, sometimes years later, long after the situation has passed.
I experienced that myself with tension around my throat. During the breathwork training, in which we learned how to become Breathwork Facilitators/Professionals, we had to practise a lot on each other. In the years before, I often noticed tension around the ‘throat area’. During the Breathwork training, very often that tension around my throat became more present. It wanted to release, bit by bit. For a long time, I had no idea where that tension came from. Until I thought of what had happened when I was about four years old.
I ran into my grandmother, who was holding a kettle of boiling water. After that, there is a gap in my memory. The memory after the gap is that I was sitting on the kitchen table, adults standing around me and me screaming in pain. Boiling water had fallen on my neck and burned it.
I have no memory of the moment the boiling water fell on my neck. But the pain, the tension, and the fear I must have felt in that moment as a four-year-old were somehow stuck in my body. Research shows that when experiences are too overwhelming to process—especially in the early years of life—the subconscious takes over and stores them somewhere in the body. That is exactly what happened back then. Recently I did a plant medicine ceremony, and I could see myself as a four-year-old in that exact moment that the boiling water burned my neck. I could see the shock, the pain, and the fear I felt in that moment. Fortunately, then the last part of the remained tension released.
There are several methods to release stored tension in the body, and Breathwork is definitely one of them (plant medicine is another one). If you notice long term tension somewhere in your body, it is definitely worth it to search for a breathwork facilitator to check the way you breathe and see if you can release tension during a breathwork session (if there are no contra-indications, I’ll write about that in one of the following stories).
In two weeks, you can read the next story on Substack: about how breathing can be extremely helpful for both the body & mind during an accident/ extreme stress situation. In that kind of situation, I met my biggest friend: Breath😊.
The following breathing exercise comes from the website:
https://www.thebreathworkmovement.nl/
There you can find more breathing information and exercises. The website is in Dutch, but you can translate it with a custom browser extension. For the Dutchies: the founder of the website, Nikki van der Velden, wrote a book (‘Jouw adem, jouw medicijn’) that contains, in my opinion, information everybody should know about breath. For the non-Dutchies: I asked if there will be an English version of the book, but unfortunately there are no plans yet.
The basics of diaphragmatic (belly) breathing: horizontal breathing
For diaphragmatic (belly) breathing, you first want to learn to breathe horizontally and through your nose — the foundation of healthy breathing. You may currently be breathing “vertically”: high in your body, with your shoulders moving as you breathe. The goal is to breathe “horizontally.”
To feel what this is like, place your hands on your sides at the level of your lower ribs. Breathe toward this area at a calm pace, through your nose, slowly and lightly. Your ribs should expand 360 degrees — to the sides, front, and back — and you should feel your hands move outward while your shoulders stay in place. Your belly will naturally move along with your breath; you don’t need to push it out. This is horizontal breathing, and this is what you want to get used to.
This is already a breathing exercise on its own: sit down, wrap your hands around your ribs, close your eyes, and breathe toward your hands for a few minutes. Notice how quickly this brings you from restlessness back to inner calm. It helps you ground yourself.
Practicing diaphragmatic (belly) breathing
Once you’ve mastered horizontal breathing, start practicing diaphragmatic breathing daily:
Sit or lie down in a comfortable place where you won’t be disturbed and close your eyes. If you can choose, lie down on your bed for extra relaxation.
Place one hand on your chest and the other on your belly.
Relax your body as much as possible. During the breath, you want the lower hand (on your belly) to move along with your breathing while the upper hand (on your chest) stays still. Note: the movement in your belly is the automatic result of your breathing—not because you tense your abdominal muscles to push your belly out, which is not the intention.
Inhale through your nose for four seconds and feel your belly move.
Hold your breath for two seconds, then exhale slowly and evenly through your nose or mouth (both are allowed for this exercise) for six seconds. Keep your mouth relaxed.
Repeat for five to fifteen minutes.
Practicing diaphragmatic breathing regularly helps your body get used to this way of breathing, and it’s also a pleasant technique to use whenever you seek relaxation.
Good to know: When you first start doing breathing exercises, you might feel a little light-headed (temporarily). If this happens, breathe at a slightly faster pace at first and slow it down gradually. You may also feel tension or mild muscle soreness in your abdominal area in the beginning — you’re activating muscles that you don’t normally use in this way. If it feels difficult at first, trust that it will become easier over time as your diaphragm becomes more flexible.
The benefits of diaphragmatic (belly) breathing
Diaphragmatic breathing provides many health benefits, such as lowering your heart rate and blood pressure, reducing the production of stress hormones, strengthening your immune system, reducing muscle tension, improving oxygen supply to your cells, increasing energy, improving concentration, and reducing feelings of restlessness, anxiety, and panic.
In summary, you may experience the following benefits of diaphragmatic breathing:
✓ Strengthens your diaphragm muscle
✓ Slows down your breathing rate
✓ Reduces (feelings of) stress and restlessness
✓ Lowers heart rate and blood pressure
✓ Optimizes the oxygen/carbon-dioxide balance
✓ Enhances physical performance (e.g., singing or running)
✓ Improves core stability
✓ Helps you connect with your body and the present moment
✓ Promotes calm and relaxation